We grew up poor, but I never felt a sense of lack. Mom was always self-sacrificing her own health and wellness to keep a roof over our heads and to keep us fed.
One of my favorite memories of her was loading up in our big wooden station wagon she nicknamed “Bertha”, and going to the drive-in movie theater.
We’d stop by the grocery store and load up on chips and snacks, and then put the seats down with pillows and comforters and just spend time together.
It probably doesn’t sound like much, but moments like these were so precious to me because I had her full attention and I didn’t get to spend much time with her growing up.
My mom was my biggest cheerleader, and had complete faith in my ability to achieve anything and be anything I wanted to be.
She never judged me, and was always full of compassion and understanding. These were some of her best traits.
But to ensure that we had what we needed to live, she worked incessantly. Overriding her need for her rest because she didn’t think she had a different choice.
Many years later, I was doing the same thing: prioritizing work over everything else, because I didn’t think I had a choice.
When she passed away, this was the wake up call that led me to deepen my search for another way of living. Something told me that this was not the way of being, intended for any human being.
My mother was only 56 when she died.
This experience reminded me that the time we have here on earth is a precious gift.
What was I going to do with the time I have left?
The one thing that feels true for me is that even if we live to be a 100, it’s still such a short blip in time, relative to time infinite.
Death can be a powerful teacher.
It certainly woke me up, inspiring me to choose differently:
To honor my sacred, healing evolution and that of others.
A life curated of what truly matters, with what resonates.
Embodying my values. Being in alignment. Honoring my truth.
Remembering that there can be ease, even in the midst of hard work and inspired action.
To clear space for healing to enter.
Missing you, Mom. You are one of my greatest teachers.
I continue to learn from you each day.